Hello West Virginia

 There's no improving on the original copy. Not sure if there was any food in the Crock Pot though.

"A Wintersville woman whose husband struck her during an argument dropped a crock pot out her third floor apartment window, Wednesday. A maintenance man who watched the pot shatter said she hadn’t aimed it at anyone. Deputies said the woman, described as “very upset and screaming,” told them they were fighting because she suspected him of having an affair with two other women in the complex. After he hit her she locked him out, and deputies warned her not to allow him back in the residence. Several hours later other residents called for help because they heard the two of them arguing. Although she initially told them they were fighting over the phone, deputies located the man in the shower, wrapped in the curtain."

From the Weirton Daily Times

There are questions Kentucky

A Lousiville woman was arrested after throwing the contents of a Crock Pot on a man. She got mad when he stopped during sex and threw hot water from the Crock Pot at the man, hitting him in the back and causing severe burns. Was there any food in the Crock Pot, or just hot water? She then tried to use the Crock Pot lid as a deadly weapon. Savage stuff. The story from Wave 3 News

Orange, California throws a lid in!

A 35 year old Orange, California man was arrested for assault with a weapon on a police officer. Officers came to the scene of the panic alarm on a car and found the suspect irate and possibly on drugs when he threw a Crock Pot lid at one of the officers. The suspect also faces, "Sentencing enhancements for inflicting great bodily injury on at least one of the officers." No word on if there was any food in the Crock Pot at the time the lid was thrown. Full story from the Orange County Register.

Church cooking

In Macon, Georgia a couple of parishioners noticed an open door to their church. When the peeked inside they saw some things were amiss, shut the door and called 911. When the authorities arrived they discovered a woman had removed some ground beef, onions and some other ingredients from the church provisions and had started cooking some mashed potatoes in a Crock Pot. I'm not sure what recipe she was following but she also tried to escape from the church, but a barred window prevented her escape. Full story from The Macon Telegraph.

In my city, he probably would have been shot

In South Brunswick, New Jersey a man allegedly on PCP was arrested for destroying his home. When the police came, he threw a microwave and Crock Pot at them. Here's where my city's police would have pulled the trigger. Unless he was white. So well done by the police in not shooting a naked man on drugs, a person who needs help. From My Central Jersey

Indiana wants me...

In Muncie a woman has been charged after throwing a Crock Pot at another woman. It seems the incident was also recorded on an iPhone. Wheb the flying Crock-pot the out of the phone camera's frame, the arresting officer reported that he "could hear the Crock-Pot striking (the accuser), followed by (that woman) yelling, "Ouch!'" Punches where also thrown. It is not known if there was food in the Crock Pot when it was thrown. Read it all at The Star Press

South Carolina throws their Crock Pot in the ring

A 21 year old South Carolina man was mad. Really mad. Throwing things, yelling, threatening people. The police were called and calmed the man down, but a few hours later he threw a Crock Pot at a dude's leg. Then he went outside and tried to set the house on fire. Seems the man was sad and wanted the attention of his family. He was arrested and charged with second-degree arson and third-degree assault and battery. Not sure if the Crock Pot was full of food. Story from Fox Carolina

San Mateo Sadness

No word on if the Crock Pot had food in it when it was stolen. This is why we need local new reporting, kids. The important information needs to be found out. "That’s a crock A slow cooker was stolen on Broadway in Redwood City, it was reported at 3:50 p.m. Saturday, June 9." That's the whole story, direct from the blotter with a cheeky headline. I think the copy writer needed to dig a little deeper to get to the meat of the story, but I'm just some guy typing in a room. Link to the Daily Journal

A case of mistaken malicious wounding

A Pittsylvania County, Virginia man was cleared of malicious wounding by his wife, who said she was hit on the head with a Crock Pot by another man. When officers showed up the house was a mess and a broken Crock Pot was found on the floor. The victim was going in and out of consciousness and was unable to tell officers who had injured her. It is not known if charges will be pressed upon the now accused malicious wounder. From the Star Tribune.

Missing Montana Toddler Found Safe

Sure you can miss a toddler hiding in the cupboard. After a neighborhood search involving a lot of people the kid was found in the kitchen cupboard, hiding behind a Crock Pot. How big was this Crock Pot? Really, the kid seems normal size, how does one hide behind a Crock Pot - not to be seen? From KULR.

Regarding This Is Us

It's fiction. This blog only exists to report on reality,

Indiana checks in

Dude was really mad that there were bones left in the Crock Pot so he bit and hit a very pregnant woman. Not cool, Travis. No idea what kind of bones were in the Crock Pot. From the Star Press.

Montana chimes in

A man house sitting in Hamilton has been charged with a number of things after the fact. "According to court documents, the woman went to Arizona in October 2013, and left her home in the care of Brian Brow. When she returned in May 2014, Brow was missing and so were at least 20 other items, including her 2001 Buick Park Avenue car, a large anvil, an antique sewing machine, 20 pocket watches and a large crock pot. The value of the missing items is estimated at about $15,000." How much is a large anvil worth? I'm almost compelled to start a Large Anvil crime blog. H Almost. Full story from the Ravalli Republic.

From a Worcester Docket.

"Nicholas A. Tower, 34, of 23 Burbank St., Millbury, charged with strangulation or suffocation, assault and battery on a family/household member (subsequent offense), and assault and battery with a dangerous weapon (crock pot), continued to Dec. 12." Did he use the power cord? Was there food in the Crock Pot? From the Worcester Telegram

Why down the stairs, why?

In Lewiston, Pennsylvania, a 33 year old man is under arrest after beating and choking his girlfriend then arrested for drunk driving. There was a domestic dispute after the man's girlfriend refused to have sex with his drunk ass. He headbutted her, then threw a Crock Pot down the basement stairs before getting into his car. No word on if there was any food in the Crock Pot at the time of its descent into the basement. From the The Sentinal.

Kentucky chimes in

A Madisonville man is facing assault charges after hitting his girlfriend over the head with a heated Crock Pot. Nathaniel Jones was charged with possession of marijuana and a crack pipe was found in his vehicle. No word on what type of food was in the Crock Pot. Full story in the Madisonville Kentucky Messenger.

Oh my, Texas

From Bryan, Texas comes a story of a drunk man who spit on his woman's daughter in the kitchen of her home. His woman threw a spoon at him. He responded by throwing a Crock Pot at them. A Crock Pot filled with hot pot roast. The pair were burned and the drunk Crock Pot tosser and dinner waster has been charged with a couple of third degree felonies. Full story from the Bryan Eagle.

The Snow Toss

A New Hampshire woman waving a handgun threw kitchen items, including a Crock Pot, and sprayed dish soap in the snow before finally being arrested. Susan Becker, of Portsmouth, was reportedly upset after losing her heat. She also pulled the trigger on the gun, which was not loaded. No word on if there was any food in the Crock Pot. Full story at WFXT

Et tu, Canada

No crime was committed. Sean McQuillan was leaving Hudson's Bay with his purchase, a panini press and Crock Pot, when all of a sudden he was taken down by store security. McQuillan had the receipt in his pocket, but was still roughed up and shoved face down to the pavement after his purchase. When law abiding citizens cannot purchase a Crock Pot something needs to be done. Something more than this unread blog. I blame the panini press. Here's the full story from The Toronto Sun.

Death Down Under

A rather gruesome murder from Australia. A woman disguised herself as a man and beat her half-sister to death with a chicken shaped crock pot. Crockpot seemed to be empty at the time of the murder. The whole story here.